The other day Kanna asked me about heaven. One of his friends told that we go to heaven when we die. He asked me if I thought so too. Kanna wasn’t aware of the concept of heaven or hell until now. I replied that I will talk about all these when he is a little older.
When I was a kid, I believed that we will go to heaven or hell depending on how we behave on earth. Of course, I had a lot of questions regarding these. To imagine that someone is religiously tracking down our every action and word, and that he will be guarding the next entrance doors to our fortune or misery, and that the entry will be granted depending on a performance we give with our life; it is a lot to digest. Life is no less than a painful exam for the majority of us. We are not given the choice of attendance. We are not asked if we want to be born, not in my memory. Life, which is a mystery to all of us even when we do the living part of life, and we are expected to do all of it with no errs! Yeah, I had a lot of questions about the after death part; I still have.
As I grew up, I found out that I do have a choice on what to believe, that my beliefs should grow up with me, that evolution is a must for us humans and for our beliefs which plays a significant role in making us humans. So my belief isn’t the one of a five-year-old kid now. At 32, I believe that death is a mystery. I choose to believe that death is not the end. I choose to believe that I don’t know what I will be greeted with when I die. But I refuse to accept that there is a heaven and a hell. It can’t be that simple. I don’t want it to be. Maybe we are just the tokens of a bigger board game played by those who were deceased a long time ago, and when we die we would get promoted as a player from a token. In my head the possibilities with death and what comes after death are endless. And no, I am not ready to meet my death yet because I haven’t written down all those possibilities yet. And as I grow older and my thoughts evolve more, my idea of death and what comes after may change again.
I never force my kid to make his choices threatening him with where he will go after he dies. I find it amusing to do so, when I, myself, aren’t sure about what’s in store after one dies! I also find it wrong to force a kid or anyone for that matter, to make choices showing an outline of the end result (which of course, no one alive knows about). I want him to make good choices because he wants to do so, not because that’s the right thing to do in someone else’s eyes or in an anticipation of a shinier trophy at the end of the race.
I don’t want to live with the idea that after my life here on earth, I still have to wait for a final judgement and I won’t put that idea in my son’s head.
What do you think about heaven and hell?
Linking with #MondayMusings
Void Thoughts 
We create our realities . I would have told we came from god and go back to god as simple as that.The only place we respect other religion is when we don’t respect our religion . No two swords can be in the same holder . religion is a path of belief that is why I say we create our realities . We have evolved much , we don’t have to believe anything more . Now we have a better reference around us, we have better educated people around us , so lets start applying ourselves rather than working on bit and pieces of message we hear . Belief is most messed up thing in our country .
Hope educated folks like us bring a sense of awareness of humanity .
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Thoughtful post…and I think your response was quite right! It is a question best left for the kids to explore as they grow up and begin to make their own inferences through their beliefs. I think the concept of ‘good’ and ‘bad’ behaviour is more relevant at their age as a foundation to what they might build upon later. My son was an agnostic until very recently much to the shock of a lot of our friends and family. They need to figure out a few things on their own too!
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that’s how I grew up too… with the concept of hell and heaven, but I guess as we grow and start understanding life, we start making our choices and beliefs. But to explain a lifetime of thinking/experience to a kid, I feel is always a challenge. 🙂
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Good one.
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Thanks.
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Thank you!
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Do you know there is actually no such concept in Hindu religion. There is no heaven and hell as per our literature. Only karma and its cycles.. Maybe this as a concept can be taught to kids..no?
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Right at the core of life and death isn’t is… I guess I am open and also like to discuss different views on this, no one knows for sure right, and maybe thats how it has to be. Very thoughtful read- I enjoyed it:-)
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I think the way you’re handling the question is wonderful. We made a point when our children were younger (they’re 15, 18, and 20 now) to answer their questions simply, and as they got older we made them aware that there are many different answers to those questions. As a result, our household is now a mix of religions and beliefs, and everyone respects each other. 🙂
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That’s perfect, Traci. Every one should be given the choice. Your household is simple and perfect and admire you for bringing up your kids that way. It’s amazing. 🙂
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Thank, you Vinitha. I really appreciate that. 🙂
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Gosh! That’s a hard one to explain to a little boy. You are right – this tracking of actions and going to heaven or hell is not the right idea. May be you can tell him Heaven is where God lives. It’s His home 🙂
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It is so wise of you Vinitha to want Kanna to exercise right choices because he wants to do so and not because of there is a heaven or a hell in waiting. I personally run away from all those who try to sell this concept of heaven and hell. I believe there are none as separate entities. We experience the heaven and hell here on earth in the type of life we end up leading. I believe in Karmic cycle and rebirths. A few months back I read the book ‘Many life Many Progressions’ and that contributed to my understanding of what happens after death.
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I honestly don’t know what awaits me after death, and like you say, thinking about it, the possibilities are endless. Maybe there’s a xerox copy of this world in the next world that awaits me, and what I couldn’t finish here, I get to finish there. Good that your beliefs aren’t what they used to be. Seeing heaven and hell depicted by cartoons, even I had the notion of a fiery hell and a cloudy heaven then. 🙂
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I’m so glad you haven’t settled on giving Kanna this simplistic concepts, Vinitha. Too often God is made out to be a policeman keeping scores and dishing out fines. We know it doesn’t work that way in life, so surely it can’t in death too. Yes, death and dying is a mystery but my notion of an all-loving God makes me unafraid of what is to come.
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I loved the way your thoughts gravitated towards a moral in the end. I don’t think of afterlife nor do i believe in the concept of heaven and hell. Why would anyone worry about matters that are yet to be proven beyond doubts. We are not even sure what is going to happen after death. I have a hunch that the whole mirage was created with good intentions in the first place. To promote virtue in the minds of human being. Slowly, people started misusing the concept and started giving definition to their own ideas of heaven and hell.
I think, what is more important is to live one’s life according to the rhythm of one’s heart. But they ought to be taught to keep away from wrong doings, at the same time.
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I also don’t believe in heaven and hell, and it was a bit awkward when another kid talked to my kids about it one day. I’d like to believe there is something more than what is happening right now, but I try to get all my living in just in case there is not.
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Very interesting! I still remember the first time I heard about it was when I was 6 and my granny’s maid took out a little picture of Jesus and his followers in heaven and the rest of the world in hell. According to her theory, I would be in hell purely because I wasn’t Christian and I was terrified of burning in Hell. Luckily my grandma explained that Christine was uneducated and that there was no heaven and hell. She said I’d be punished if I was bad and rewarded if I was good.
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It’s clear you’ve thought a lot about this subject and have a lot of intelligent and thoughtful reflections on this topic. Which is why I think you should start talking with your son about this now. You don’t have to go into as much reflection now, but I think you can easily have a discussion. And considering he’s asking you, I think it’s also important as he’s likely to get conflicting information from peers that may be confusing him and causing anxiety.
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